The Calm is lovely - only rarely now am I anxious and usually there's an identifiable reason - went to the dentist yesterday, for example!! The free-floating stuff is almost gone - what a relief. Yesterday I ripped a half-made scarf out of the loom and threw it away - it had been frustrating and I wasn't all that happy with the color result - instead of feeling guilt and shame (How dare I waste yarn, how dare I give up in the middle of a project, what kind of person am I that would ....), I felt massive relief!!! I have lots of lovely projects planned and this was keeping me from them. Today I start a new scarf for my lovely sister-in-law and I'm delighted!!!
I am going to have my anxiety medicine refilled just in case - there's something very comforting about it nestling in my purse... Mike and I are following our daughter's lead and have started a new diet - it's called Whole30 and involves meat, veggies, and fruit with absolutely no processed foods at all - I've made mayo, tomato paste and salad dressing. I've clarified butter and read a million recipes - for a recent vegetarian, it's a bit of a stretch, but I've been having a lot of allergy issues lately and I think some of that may be food related - I'd already stopped eating gluten, so that bit's not hard and we eat a LOT of vegetables, so there's still relaxing chopping, chopping, chopping! We live in a great place to do this, although most things we make are usually missing one of two things that aren't available here - and they're still excellent, so no matter...
Life is good and getting better - really, going NC with my Nsiblings has been the very best thing I've ever done to take care of me. There's an element of sadness to that, but there was a larger element of sadness to letting them harass me without doing anything to protect myself. I'm feeling more comfortable in my own skin. Hurrah!!!
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